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Waiting for inspiration

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Waiting for inspiration The air in a waiting room carries a specific kind of weight, a density that seems to swallow sound. For centuries, artists have tried to capture this heavy, invisible presence. I think of Honoré Daumier , who portrayed the slumped, weary resignation of third-class travellers. He understood that waiting wasn't just sitting; it was an endurance sport. I see that same heavy air, but my era is electrified. The figure on the left isn't just sitting; they are anchored against a storm of data. Their head is buried in their hands, face half-hidden as if they're trying to crawl inside their own mind to escape the silence. The thick, aggressive slashes of orange and gold overhead resemble a visual scream, capturing that internal chaos where your thoughts race at a hundred miles an hour while your body is stuck in a plastic chair. The green glow on their skin adds a cold, modern tension, making the whole scene feel like a pulse vibrating beneath a still surface...

The Shuddering Breath I Became

  

The Shuddering Breath I Became

The cryo unit hisses open, and I remember my name: JB, pilot of the *Subi*. The med-techs call it “revitalisation.” My body hums with a new, raw power. Muscles knit with synthetic fibres, bones laced with carbon-filament. I feel incredible. Invincible.

But in the polished chrome of the med-bay wall, my reflection is a stranger. The eyes are mine, but they glow with a faint, amber diagnostic light. The scar from the asteroid scrape is gone, replaced by skin too perfect, too seamless.

They say they rebuilt me better. Stronger. To survive the long dark. But when I clench my fist, I hear a servo-whine they insist isn’t there. When I calculate a jump vector, the numbers resolve instantly in my mind, not on a screen. Is this their design? A monster of efficiency, crafted for a purpose I didn’t choose?

Or is the monster the part of me that wanted this? The part that, bleeding out in my crippled cockpit, whispered *yes* to any salvation? Did I consent to the erasure of my own softness?

I stare at the reflection. The amber eyes stare back. The line between their masterpiece and my desperation has frozen, shattered, and reformed into something I can no longer recognise. The real question isn’t what they made. It’s whether I’ll have the courage to face the thing I allowed myself to become.

The Digital Reflection

I raise my hand, but it isn't skin that greets me—it’s a dark, articulated gauntlet of fused carbon. It blocks the light, heavy with a power I didn't earn but desperately needed.

The world doesn't look like a place anymore; it looks like a schematic. Green targeting reticles burn over my vision, dissecting reality into distance, velocity, and threat levels before my heart even has time to beat. The red heat of the old panic is still there, smouldering across my face like a fever, but it’s trapped beneath the glitching layers of this new interface.

I stare into the data stream that has replaced my reflection, watching the code rewrite my soul in real-time. The real question isn’t what they made. It’s whether I’ll have the courage... to face the thing I ALLOWED myself to become.









John Bennett - AKA JJFBbennett, is an independent artist. You can view and subscribe to my work via Blogger, YouTube, Flicker, Facebook, Instagram and Deviant Art

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Copyright

This artwork is protected by U.S. and International copyright laws. Distribution and/or modification of the artwork without the written permission of the sponsor is prohibited.


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