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Artists Who Stare

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  Artists who Stare into their Creative Self Vignette There is a reckoning in the soul of every artist. It begins as a tremor, a flicker of light, almost imperceptible, yet relentless in hunger. That precise moment when the artist is alone, silhouetted against the radiance of an internal inferno and stares unflinchingly into their creative self. They dwell in the space between inspiration and doubt, bathed in the glow of possibilities and tormented by the fear of mediocrity. To exceed the ordinary, the artist knows, is both a blessing and a curse. Each touch, each word, each act of creation becomes a paradox: an offering to eternity but rooted in the fleeting frailty of the present. What if they fail? What if the light within, so achingly bright, burns them to ash rather than illuminating their path? The act of creation is no longer a choice; it has become a necessity. There is no turning back. Like a lone figure before the furnace of their own making, the artist surrenders to the ...

Jingili Water Bug

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Jingili Water Bug From behind a sacred figurehead Return from objectivity  Return from functionalism  Return from disciplinary power Move towards subjectivity and genuine ideas To find states of mind within the disorders  Of fidelity Of passion Of paganism Of earthliness This internal world Of no plot Of no absolutism Nothing that is incontrovertibly true Unpretentious Of mutual interest  Of mutual understanding One-off sponsorship You Tube

Jingili Water Gardens We Cannot Know

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Jingili Water Gardens  We cannot know My concern  My change in life We are not what we were We are not what we will be I keep falling back into place And as I fall  Everything seems to be  As if I know Of free choice Within my confinements  Restricted by rules of consumption  I see only windows and reflections In the twilight I am doing it I am trying to reach Beyond my opportunities Thinking thoughts, not for consumption Disturbing impulsive thoughts Those darker imaginings Those emergent creative powers Repress them Keep them secret One-off sponsorship You Tube

Jingili Water Gardens Restricted Freedoms

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Jingili Water Garden Restricted Freedom Covid-19 2020 Just do it Barriers onto my normality Just do it Being free to act within restrictions Just do it We cannot know things as they are in themselves (Kant) Darwin Jingili Water Gardens  The mango trees are all in bloom. My life is in bloom. At 60. In the shadows of COVID-19. From what I visioned as the year of synchronicity 2020 has on the surface has, all but shut down. Social barriers box in my normality. Instead of travel, I’m staying home.  Australia has shut down its borders, and so have I.  So after a massive start, working under pressure, and meet stressful deadlines, I am questioning what it is I do. Do I meaner through my holidays without care and intensity? That is, feeling relaxed without care. This self-reflection is about ‘just do it.’  I have dedicated myself to education for decades, and I am fastly approaching retirement. Since my early years as an artist and extended absence, I have fantasized abou...

Visually Inspired Behavior

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“The primary cause of disorder in ourselves is the seeking of reality promised by another.” ― Krishnamurti We teach our students content that makes sense but we do not teach skills in how to prepare for situations that do not make sense. Society works hard to present normality as that without disorder. That is to you know where you are; what you are expected to do; and that the flowers you pass every day are the same flowers. However, we do not teach students, to see different flowers on each passing and that the river is not the same. If one in every five adults experience mental illness why is it that schooling is predominately about 'promised' normality and not preparing for the disorder 'of the promise'. Schooling for anxiety, depression, attention deficit disorder, post-traumatic stress, psychosis, and schizophrenia is required. Society could do well by flipping the school. Every student has a story to tell. School as a check-in rather than a check-out. Are our stu...

Darwin Jingili Water Gardens Days 8-10

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In a social environment, each repeating action is slightly different, even when social interactions are limited to a few actors and a limited range of actions is undertaken. Walking past a stranger and muttering 'good morning' or making a hand or facial gesture, whilst limited is also grounding. Each repeated action improves the experience of the activity. The smile gets bigger and ignoring more pronounced.  The gesture shifts from novel to heightened and then to automation. Simple transactions fall into the shadows or normality. The gesture occurs without realization. It is systematized.  Is there a way of not plateauing into reductive repetitive activity and to continually improve the experience?  Perhaps gamification? For example, one reaction for one person and another for another person.  My original and prior thoughts were that continuous and repeated actions inhibit each transaction's ability to adapt. So mix it up - change hand & facial gestures - make th...

Australian Post - why are we doing their job?

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I have a problem ​My issue concerns automation and human-based services. The Australian postal service was originally based on the daily delivery of mail, however, with email and automated billing fewer mail is delivered. So the efficiency of maintaining a full fleet of mail persons is questioned - fewer posties are required. However, corresponding automation of delivery has occurred - that is buying consumable products through online services such as Amazon. Online services require fewer retail staff, however, they need people to deliver the order to complete the order. My problem is that we (the customer) are using our resources to complete the transaction. Both companies are relying on our time and cost to complete the transaction. In Australia much of the online delivery is achieved by the Australian Postal services, however, the manual delivery method hasn't much changed to accommodate online orders. There are perhaps more delivery vans than ever before and fewer mail bikes, h...

Darwin Jingili Water Gardens Day 7-8

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On reflection, although I have mainly worked in a people-based industry (education), my mode of operations has been product-based. Dealing with large numbers of people invariably leans towards systematization. I focussed on systematization - that is - a step-by-step process underlined by consistency, performance, and dependability. Everyone knows, does their job, knows their timelines, and meets deadlines as expected. The systems that are designed by the controller's realities and meets expected standards. What I have found difficult over the journey and within the systematization of process and procedure were attitudes and behaviors. The intended system always seemed incomplete and momentarily lapsed into unreliability. Quite a few years back I became interested in error - more specifically accumulated error. I also became interested in values and the lingering ghosts of previous systems. I now realize that learning growth, change management, project management, and the success of...

Darwin Jingili Water Gardens Day 6-7

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The simplicity of services is easily boxed into a dominance-based designated hierarchy, which can be readily demonized by those who feel displaced from control. The essence of trickle-down power is easily seen and used to maintain the status quo of those who control the money, control the product, and ultimately controls the user. In short, the experiences of the user are the output of those who know best. Jingili Water Gardens is a planned space,  where you can safely enjoy the outdoors and enjoy a manicured form of nature. I enter Jingili Water Gardens with an understanding of order. Everything is in the right place for the right purpose. My role is to enjoy the experience, knowing that decisions have been made for my enjoyment. I know that there is a park and gardens hierarchical structure. There are people accountable for my enjoyment and well-being. The structure continually makes decisions and takes action to improve my experience. I don't expect tomorrow's experience wil...

Darwin Jingili Water Gardens Day 4-5

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Across the first 3 to 4 days of walking around Jingili Water Gardens my thinking evolved from discovery and my understanding of the actual scope of commitment it will take to realize a creative breakthrough. My reflection efforts have been centered on observing my thinking and my thoughts about my thinking. I now realize that I have evaded thinking about my cognitive psychology and what I bring to the gardens each repeated activity. In short, the subconscious filters that inhibit my perceptions As mentioned in previous reflections, I am a career educator and a fledgling artist, and I am preparing my exit from educational leadership and building my aspirations as a late-career artist. The repeated activity is intended to enable me to find a difference that can help support a transformation. On the macro, when I entered my artistic and education-based careers, computers were not readily available. As such, the Fine Arts course I completed at RMIT was in oil painting and teacher training ...

Darwin Jingili Water Gardens Day 3-4

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After 3 three days of enacting a forced repetitive activity, I am starting to feel obsessive. I have a clear mind, however, I am annoyed by not being able to achieve other to-do duties of the day. Not that walking through Jingili Water Gardens is overbearing. I am finding it pleasurable. The oxygen is clean, birds are singing, people are greeting and the temperature is wonderful. What I am finding obsessive is that writing a reflection is time-consuming. So to alleviate this pressure I am restricting my reflection from a daily event to incorporating two days of walking through Jingili Water Gardens into one reflection. Do I feel driven to engage in one reflection per activity? Yes. Do I feel anxiety and guilt for not achieving my goal? Yes. Did I underestimate the commitment? Yes. In three days I lost control of my task and had to reprocess how I am to achieve purpose without repurposing or letting go. My holiday intention was to not 'just do it' with the purpose of performing ...